amateur

I just read an article about Dez Bryant's disappointmentwith the NCAA and the amateur athlete rules and the enforcement thereof.  For those of you like me, who have no clue who Dez Bryant is you can read the article or just know that he's currently in the NFL, and played college football for Oklahoma State from 2007 to 2009 and one time worked out and had lunch with (former NFL star) Deion Sanders.  I don't know the details of this lunch or whatever, but it had the potential to violate NCAA rules so the incident was investigated. 

Remember the scene in The Blind Side where Michael Oher is taken into the NCAA office and interrogated about his connections with the Tuohys and such.  He's a nervous wreck and has no idea what to say about why he chose Ole Miss.  I would imagine that most college athletes that get investigated are pretty nervous about it, especially since you know that none of them have ever even tried to read the NCAA bylaws, and probably don't know if what they did violated Code 4 Law 26 Section 7.3.1.

So in the course of Dez Bryant being investigated he lied.  He said he didn't have lunch with Deion, and when the NCAA eventually found out that he did (though no NCAA rule was violated in the process) he was suspended for 10 games for lying.  10 games aka, the rest of his senior season.  You probably wonder why he lied, and I would love to interview him, I'm sure it had something to do with not being sure if what he did was illegal or not, so he tried to avoid the whole issue by lying about it.  True, not the best choice but a logical one for a 20 year old kid.

Fast forward to 2010, Ohio State quarter back Terrelle Pryor (among others on the team) sells things he owns (championship ring, jersey pieces, shoes, etc) in exchange for some tattoos.  Again, not the best choice but a fairly logical one for a 20 year old kid.  (The choice being "I own this, I'll sell it").  Terrelle (along with some of his teammates) is suspended for 5 games, but not their next game which was the  Rose Bowl.  Terrelle decided he didn't want to be suspended for 5 games and joined the NFL where he still had to sit out for the first 5 games (kudos to the NFL for enforcing that) but got paid half a million to do so ($580,000 signing bonus). 

So to recap: Dez doesn't do anything wrong, but lies about it and gets his senior year revoked.  Terrelle does something 'wrong' and lies about it and gets to play his final game and get paid half a million.  hmm....

In all fairness timing makes a big difference here, because Terrelle was investigated near the end of the year, and his sentence came at the end of the season.  Dez was investigated over the summer so his sentence came near the beginning of the season.  Technically Terrelle also missed his senior year (he went to the NFL early), and Dez did get a 1.9 million signing bonus.  HOWEVER, Terrelle still only got 5 games, while Dez got 10.  Seems unfair.

Okay, new track.... Let's imagine that I'm really cool and still in college.  Let's say I write a book, and it goes on to become #1 best seller.  Some other famous person invites me to dinner, wahoo!  Now imagine that I'm an actor, a director, or singer.  I become famous, go to a red carpet premier, I sign pictures of myself and sell them for $1,000.   It's all good.  Now imagine I did those things, but I also play on my college ultimate frisbee team.  I'll probably be investigated by the NCAA to make sure I didn't receive any improper benefit from my athlete status.  Those are crazy and somewhat extreme examples, but I think its something to think about.  I don't think college athletes should be paid necessarily, but I do think there is some change/reform needed in the overall system of rules, investigation, and punishment.  Also some if the NCAA did something to help protect athletes from being exploited by others.  (When people started selling Johnny Football t-shirts the NCAA just joined in and Manziel's family had to file suit to stop them and trademark his likeness.)  

It's a mad mad mad mad world...  but I still love football, and I sure hope Johnny gets to play this year.  I think by suspending him the NCAA is just encouraging him to leave to the NFL early (as it did for Terrelle).

As another side note, I found this incredibly interestingsite on NFL player's salaries.

when honest people steal

I've been meaning to write a lot of stuff for a long time.  For now, here's a story.

Stephanie and I went running in our apartment complex's rec-room one evening (as we often do), and even though I didn't lock our front door for the 30 minute excursion, I still brought my keys with me.  So we ran, I placed my keys in the cup-holder on the treadmill.  (Really?  a cup-holder on a treadmill?  let's call it a water-bottle-holder).  Then after running I walked around a bit, stretched, got a drink from the drinking fountain.  Then we left, and I left my keys behind. 

The following morning was quite disastrous.  Stephanie usually keeps her keys in the car, to help her not forget to take them to school, and that's where they were in the morning, inside the locked car.  My keys of course were nowhere to be found I went back to the rec-room, but found the treadmill water-bottle-holder empty.  Someone might have taken them and given them to the office?  Sadly the office was closed that early in the morning.  A good while later and not-the-best-locksmith-in-the-world had my car door open and we're off to work for the day.

That afternoon though I dropped by the office and sure enough there were my keys in one of the desk drawers.  "Some honest resident dropped these by" says the office secretary.  And that is how honest people steal.  Had they just left them there where I'd left them, there probably wasn't anyone who would have taken them, and I could have found my keys that morning and been happy.  Of course an honest person turns things into the lost & found....

The Facebook

Today I took an hour out of my schedule to go to the Marriott Center where there was a forum where about 10,000 students came to listen to Mark Zuckerberg and Orin Hatch.  Questions were submitted from students and they (mostly Mark) answered and talked about interesting topics in technology, education, entrepurnership, and government regulation.  The conversation seemed highly political, neither person wanting to say anything inappropriate to tarnish their reputation.

It was interesting to hear Mark speak about things such as dropping out of Harvard and making philatropical donations, and I found him to be rather personable.  He seemed real, and I think that's why he'd done such a great job with facebook and all, because he is real.

It was about six years ago in May that I sat around a lunch table with my 'friends' at Anacortes High School.  (Having just moved there my friends consisted of those in my classes, the AP calculus and physics nerds.)  One of my friends, who had just been accepted to Stanford asked us how many of us had already been accepted to a university, most of us had, and he told us that with our newly acquired university e-mail addresses we could join an online social site called "TheFacebook.com"  he said, "Go home today, go to thefacebook.com, and make a profile, then we can all be friends."  We created silly groups (The Citrus Horse) and had meaningless conversations which was about all facebook was good for back then.

That summer I joined into some BYU freshman groups and made a few friends, one of which actually ened up in my Freshman ward!  One of the few friends I have ever met 'digitally'.  Facebook of course became an important part of the 'freshman experience' for me, and it's existence changed my life in a small way, as it has for millions of other people.

I have begun to use facebook less and less, but not to say it's not important.  Just this morning I recieved a wedding invitation from a very dear friend, albeit one who I have little contact with these days.  And so facebook goes on, changing lives if ways big and small everyday.

in my head

I'm standing in the MARB waiting for a class, there are people all around, sitting on the ground mostly reading or texting.  There is also a girl who looks and sounds Russian talking on her phone, in Russian.  I begin to wonder what she is talking about, is she a spy, a terrorist, a scientist looking for high tech secrets, or perhaps passing info on the education system here back to top officials in Russia.  She is speaking quickly (at least it sounds fast to me) and seems a little stressed (or maybe distressed).  

Then her Russian is broken by something I recognize, 'Ma, Ma, Mama!...' and she continues complaining to her mother about how hard of a time she is having here at the beginning of the semester.  She's not a spy after all, she's just a normal student, having normal problems that her normal mother still doesn't understand.

not today

Remember that part on Toy Story when Woody and Buzz are flying up in the air 'cause Buzz is strapped to that rocket and Wood is all worried that they're going to explode and he says, "This is part where we blow up!" and Buzz suavely replies, "Not today!" pushes the button to release his spring-loaded wings, cutting the duck-tape and allowing them to glide away to safety. ... yeah, I like that part.

So the other day I was feeling very grateful for some of my material possessions, namely my beautiful earphones. A few months ago I posted about the varying quality of the earphones I used, saying how great it would be to have a real nice pair of earphones that could deliver superb quality etc. Well my loving mother read that post and decided that Santa should give me such for christmas, hence I now own a very fine pair of d-Jays, noise-canceling, in-ear earphones. While ecstatic over their quality I was dismayed that I had but my laptop in terms of portable music (translation: I had no iPod), it was still absolutely marvelous to watch movies with my own personal surround sound.

However, before the new semester even started, I was chillin' with some friends talking about Christmas gifts when one friend mentioned they got a new iPod Touch, I jokingly (but slightly serious) asked if I could then have her old iPod nano. She said sure, and I am now a happy owner of a silver, 3rd gen. iPod nano :-D. As I was moseying around campus, listening to some killer tunes, I realized how extremely glad I was for this gift. I think it is a great halmark of a deeply christian person that they may not act nice on an outward, every-day level, but when it comes to the big things they're ready to give.

All I have to say, go world.

These feelings I'm feeling

Since beginning my last post I have struggled with defining how I feel about people I know not of my faith. I have given it much thought, and explored my feelings deeply. I have several friends who are not 'mormon,' and I took into account experiences with all of them that allowed me to develop my ideas here. I will try to be very generic in this analysis, but hopefully you can all still understand what I'm trying to say.

First of all, I do not think that this is a feeling that is possessed solely by me, I think this same feeling is experienced by people all over the world, any one person with a good friend, with said friend making decisions contrary to what said person thinks is "right." People are often afraid to offend their friend, such offense rising from one person trying to 'force' the other to do certain things. I say 'force' because they usually don't mean it that way, but are afraid of having their intentions come off that way. People are afraid to ruin their good relationship, a fear driven by not know what their friends reaction might be. So is it fear?

Despite any fear, such a person would continue to have a desire to talk to their friend about religion or making 'better' decisions. This desire (I think) is driven partialy by guilt. They feel guilty that by saying/doing nothing they aren't fulfilling their belief or duty to their religion and thence they feel guilty toward their religion/belief for such betrayal. A second reason for their desire could be because of their sincere belief in this religion, not so much guilt for not sharing, but a robotic programmatic response ('zombie' like you might say) that zealots of certain religions obtain through complete devotion to their religion.

Another (related) reason for their desire could be out of genuine concern/love for their friend. For me, there are a few things in this world that I love above everything else, and I love them because they fill me with joy and make this life worth living. First is the gospel of Jesus Christ (and ever family, friend, truth thing pertaining thereunto). Second is skiing. Finally is Apple computers (awesome technology in general). For me, the joy that I get from these three is enough to cause me to want to share these things with my best friend. When I love someone I want to share with them my greatest joys so they too can be joyful. I am please to report that my current direct link converts (those I've converted, not converts of converts) to skiing number around six, and to Apple around five :-) (Having spent two years doing nothing but 'converting' people to the gospel, my number there significantly higher). The point being that wanting to share joy is a valid reason for having a desire to share religion with your friends.

It goes on in an eternal balance your desire to share counter balanced with your fear of their unknown reaction. And I think for myself the only way to resolve this dilemma comes in the form of a question: Would I still be friends with them if I knew that in the end they would never join the church? Regardless of the fact that we cannot predict the future, lets assume we can, and say that the future says that friend will never share the same beliefs or live the same standards as said person, are you still friends with them?

For one friend of mine, she was never a member of my church, she never shared standards, though she was an overall 'good person'. I do not fear offending her because our relationship was never based in the church. Another friend I made in Washington was in my ward there. Since our parting he has left the church, and I have little desire to see him again, simply because our original connection no longer exists. Finally the friend who sparked this train of thoughts, though our original connection was through the church, or friendship developed over a long period of time and transcended, religion, age, or sexual preference.... Some friends really are forever.

If you read all of that, I'm impressed, if you feel like you just wasted ten minutes of your life please let me know and I'll do my best to get it back to you ;-)

The Story of Some Talents

I once knew a pair of twin sisters who loved to dance. These sisters, Amy and Emily, had gotten into clogging while they were still pretty young and by high school they were on teams that toured around and they had not only become very good at dancing, but they grew more and more in love with dancing. I met these two in our freshman year at college and they were on some dance team, practicing often and having awesome performances. I was friends with not only Amy and Emily, but also their four other roommates, a handful of some of the funnest people I've ever met. I would often spend my days hanging out at their apartment, doing homework, talking nonsense, doing dishes... you know it's only been four years since then, but I have a hard time remembering just what it was I was doing there. I remember it was relaxing to be at their apartment, I felt at home.

Something I will probably always remember though, was once sitting idly in their kitchen while Emily was cooking some food. As she stood at the stove stirring her noodles (or whatever it was she was cooking) she was softly bouncing as her toes and heels tapped out rhythms from their dance routine. For me it was a small indication of just how much these girls LOVED to dance, more than anything else, and how it permeated their entire lives. I went to a large dance show that winter 'Christmas Around the World' and as I watched them dance I couldn't imagine them being any happier. Their smiles were just so huge and full of joy.

Yesterday I went to the dance devotional and saw them again dancing some amazing pieces, again with engaging and full smiles permanent on their faces. It really made me enjoy the performance that much more because I felt like I really knew how much they were enjoying the performance, and also how much work, effort, and practice they had put into it. I began to reflect on other people I know that shine while performing and I could recall various others who when dancing, singing, acting, or even cooking, would grown between their ears the largest and fullest smile possible. Such a smile is contagious I think, and blesses those who see it.

I think there is a lesson to be learned here about sharing talents. If there's something that you love that much, and you can do it at a performance level then it can truly become a great blessing to those you share it with. Perhaps hidden away in us all is the happiness of doing what we love and it is my prayer today that we can discover it, do it, and use it to bless others.

p.s. in the first picture Amy is the first full face you can see on from the left, and in the second she's up and to the right of the guy right in the middle. I guess she's more photogenic, I couldn't find any pictures of Emily, and actually another of their roommates, April, is also in the ensemble now.

Simplicity in Society

I have had many a thought about this, and today I wish to put my thoughts on to paper. I have discovered the addicting draw of facebook's ever popular 'Like' button. (And just a side note, it bothers me a lot that the word facebook isn't in my computer's dictionary.... oh, just fixed that one). For those of you less familiar with facebook, the 'Like' button is just a little button you can click in reference to any thing someone else has posted, a picture, a comment, a story, really anything that happens on facebook you can 'Like' it. Other options include making a comment, you could also write on someone's wall, or even send them a personal message. I believe that I have just ranked these actions based on the likelihood of being done, you only send a personal message if you feel it very important to convey specific information to certain people, a wall message is a social move that could engage a electronic conversation, then a comment is something that many people may reply to or make additional comments too, however the expectation for such is much lower. Finally the 'Like' button is something you can do, allowing a person to see that you have read thier post, seen thier pictures, and you enjoyed it however this leaves you with no social obligation to explain why you like it, to try to be funny, to try and begin a conversation... anything at all, it's extraordinarily non-committal. In fact, I would almost go as far as to say it is quite empty, a lower form of communication than even the 'high-five.'

I'm not saying I'm against 'Liking' things; no, no, I do it all the time, and I love it when people 'like' my stuff. Granted I am much more pleased to see actual comments and the occasional wall post for me, but all the same I believe the 'Like' button has found its useful niche in conveying vague interest but without the binding commitment of a conversation. I think that this point is somewhat proven by the fact of it's existence, and furthermore by it's seeming popularity of usage. I do however wonder if that is a good, bad, or even if it could be considered a societal trend at all. That trend would be the decreasing person relationships and drifting toward more empty, ambiguous, and noncommittal modes of communication.

I find it interesting that people I met in high school, but were never really friends with I can 'Like' things they do, and they to me, and yet our lack-of-an-actual-friendship continues, it amuses me.

here's some other ideas on the subject: Wall Street Journal and Elder Bednar

tmi

I recently created a note on Facebook. It was one of those chain notes, answer the questions, tag some people and see the comments flow in. I chose to do this on a whim, quickly starting as I read a friend's who had tagged me. I choose 15 people based on what came to mind first which ended up being those who I had been in contact with in the past 24 hours (perhaps even in order from the most amount of time to the least). Then I proceed to answer questions, and as fate would have it, a majority of the more prying questions fell on people that there was actually information to pry about. I however maintained a steady policy of honesty, to the point of being blunt and possibly offensive at some points, revealing somethings that perhaps should have remained hidden.

I found it an interesting release for myself, despite being myself uncomfortable with some of the answers I gave, and fearful of what they may say to me after reading this note. I suppose I put a lot of trust in the tendency of people to assume that someone is kidding when they give cutting remarks, and while most who read this note will likely see my humor throughout, they will also notice that the comments are truthful. I'm not sure just what I think about the whole idea of exposing your heart and soul to anyone at BYU that is inclined to read my note. It creates an interesting feeling, and again, despite putting all truth that I could muster, even embellishing on many items to create an interesting read, I think many people will not consider at as serious or important as it was to me. That is a good thing in the end, I do believe.

I think many bloggs are the same way, the writing puts down random peices of their soul, often being very truthful and deeply minded as they write. While readers may skim over the piece, think it's interesting, maybe even eave a comment, but rarely, if ever, will they feel the full meaning that the writer felt (unless on the rare occasion the reader was some one also directly involved in the event blogged about). Writing allows a person to take thier time to put down their true thoughts and intentions. "Writing maketh an exact man," so says an inscription at the Library of Congress, and I believe it to be true.

Bring on the Rain

Today I took a drive. I would like to say that I just had nothing to do and a urge to burn gas so I drove around a bit, but that's not true. (I used to be able to like about simple things... I can't now). My sister Kacy was visiting and she needed to be taken to my other sister's (Coleen) house in Holiday, so I took the hour and a half to get her there. On our way there we saw a huge, dark cloud over Salt Lake City with quite the marvelous display of lightning. Not far into the valley we were greeted by the wind, dust, and eventually rain- rain that came down in intermittent sheets, like buckets being tossed out of a window above. We sat in the car in the pouring rain for a few minutes while waiting for Coleen to show up, then I left. It was about 8:30 pm as I was leaving, and while the storm clouds were still overhead the sunset in the west was peaking through creating a beautiful phenomenon known to most as a rainbow. Cursing myself for not having brought my camera I pulled into a radio shack parking lot to take a picture or two from my cell phone, then satisfied that I couldn't do much more continued driving home. Not long after, I saw in my rear-view mirror another beautiful scene as the sun, stretching across the entire valley was illuminating a now glowing neon green strip of the otherwise dull mountainside. Again overwhelmed with the beauty I had to take a picture. I soon pulled onto the freeway and began to drive when I noticed the far end of the rainbow I had previously seen. I followed its curvature as it faded into the storm overhead, but suddenly got starkly brilliant in one section before fading off above the ground. I quickly noticed that the same sun strip illuminating the hills behind were creating this disembodied arc-section of the rainbow. Both the far end and this small section were glowing so brilliantly, so bright, possibly the brightest I have ever seen. I note here my reaction, exclaiming out loud, "Oh my! That is BEAUTIFUL! It's- it's- the gospel must be true"

The depression of not having my camera was only deepened with the thought that I was alone in my car, a thought that goes deeper than just that moment since today I have felt very much alone. Tomorrow my roommate and best friend is going home for the summer, I will no longer have anyone to do everything with and am faced with the rigorous task of developing for myself new friendships, and deepening old ones. It's times like these when true character is displayed, and this week I have learned a little more about myself. Since Kacy was up for the week we had the chance to hang out a little bit, and more than once I chose to be with her, rather than enjoy time with my friends. While I was surprised after-the-fact at such a decision of mine, I wasn't at all saddened by it, nor regretful, but quite satisfied. Then again today in my moment of loneliness, having no one in the car with me I wanted to call a friend and share the moment, even if they couldn't see it. After a moments thought I knew who I wanted to call. (not just who I should or felt obligated to call, but who I really wanted to share this moment with... Erin Kristine Herd (my other, recently married sister). So I did, we talked, and it was good. I was truly able to share with her the moment, and she enjoyed it very much. These experiences have reminded me somewhat of who I am, I am a Murray, and I love my family. So bring on the rain, let the trials and loneliness roll, I have friends in high places who know when I need a rainbow. thanks.

Wisdom teeth and water polo

Most of us have seen or heard Brian Regan warning us to not ever tell a "two-wisdom tooth story" because we will always be one upped (or rather two upped ;-) by someone with a four wisdom tooth story (If you don't know what I'm talking about watch this:
Brian Regan on Wisdom Teeth

But you know, the people I really feel bad for aren't those with only a two wisdom tooth story, but those with only a cavity story. I mean really, how far can you get with the story, "This one time I went to the dentist-" right there you're dead, someone's going to jump in, "Oh that ain't nothing! This one time I was going to the oral surgeon..." and go on to tell his much more interesting, not-just-a-dentist story.

Moreover, I think this is somewhat of a metaphor for personality types. I know people that are simply 'just-the-dentists' people, and every story they tell isn't actually that cool, so at a dinner party they begin to tell a story, but everyone already knows that it's going to suck, so to save time they jump in over them with a different story, the person soon realizes they're not being listened to and usually quiets down. Of course I feel to bad for them that I just have to look at them and raise my eyebrows to pretend that I am waiting for them to continue, when really I am listening to the much more interesting story being told by the guy next to me. Can you imagine, "this one time we went rafting on Salem Pond-"
"Yeah, well I took a whitewater trip down the snake river!"
"I won a candy bar at a raffle-"
"This one time at a raffle, I won a car!"
"I saw some guys playing water polo-"
"I used to be on the water polo team, that's why I don't have a left ear!!"
"I once had to eat this gross soup my Asian roommate made-"
"I ate human blood!" ;-)

Some people just aren't cut out to tell stories, and I'm not dogging on those with cool-er stories. By all means tell your cool stories, they're worth hearing. My plea is to those without cool stories, do yourself and others a favor, by not looking quite so pitiful and left out and learning to enjoy listening. You know what they say:

Confused at the grace...

I attended a focus group today studying the marketing campaigns of a certain charity group, "Guatemala Children's Project". It is an interesting project taking kids off the streets, out of bad homes, and out of bad orphanages and placing them into a better orphanage with the goal of finding and rehabilitating their original family (they have programs to teach parents conflict resolution) and put them back into their original (but rebuilt) family. It seemed like a nice project. One of the key weaknesses of their marketing was illustrating the importance of saving these children and the magnitude of the problem with homeless and/or orphaned children in Guatemala. Little known fact, Guatemala ranks among the top in the world for child trafficking (children being sold both to foreign adoption agencies and into worse places than an orphanage), and actually it was said that it ranks second only to China in number of children (not percentage, but number, the population difference should give you an idea of the magnitude of this problem). Needless to say, there is a problem and this program honestly is trying to fix it.

Now as I left the focus group I hurried my way across to my New Testament class and we sung the opening hymn, "I Stand All Amazed." I felt quite amazed as I thought on all that I had just heard about these children in guatemala (not only them but people all across the world who live in poverty and problematic socioeconomic situations) and I thought, "gosh dang... i am blessed. How ever did I get to be so blessed." I mean really, here I sit with my $1,000 laptop, accessing the world through the wireless offered by a large university where I study to gain a first rate education so I can make a difference in the world (and also make money to support my family). It's cold outside but I have a nice sweater, good socks, a warm home to return to.... Maybe life isn't really fair, but I guess that gives me all more reason to do what I can to help out. Someday I hope to really make a difference, I don't know how, but I want to really make a real difference.

Life

Life is unfairly good. Well I still have troubles, and hard times, but for the most part things are going well. I enjoyed a day off of I do have a MASSIVE linear algebra test that I need to take either within the next two hours or on Monday (still undecided...) but I'm doing swell in all other accounts. Hopefully I don't sound too prideful, but I'm just gonna 'count my blessings a little'
-I have a job
-I spent a day in heaven this week
-I have a car
-I'm not failing my classes
-My roommates are my friends
-There is a lack of conflict in my life
and more.... but that's all for now

I think I have the most biased dance teacher ever.  If I didn't love dancing so much I would totally drop that, I'm nigh unto offended by her ignorance.  She always gives reasons for what you should and shouldn't do while dancing, which is good, but I'm under the impression that she's going about it all wrong.  I would guess that an appropriate reason would sound something like, "This is the technique that has been developed etc, etc." or "keeping you hands like this helps your posture stay raised and it is the proper way to dance."  In fact I think the reason that "it's the proper way to dance" is reason enough, it's like english grammar, you just do it right!  My teacher however has decided to give us better reasons for certain dance moves.  Some of which include, "because, well.. that would just look dumb" and "... and guys don't do that because it looks really femmy, and you don't want to be femmy" or "... it would look like you were trying to eat your lady..."   ok, first of all, who even says that!?!  And what if I want to be femmy? okay, so I may not be of that crowd but there sure are guys who enjoy looking feminine, what about them?  can they dance like that?  And who made her the authority on 'coolness' and 'looking dumb'?  ......... sigh   I just don't like the way she words her excuses.  She's usually right about what should and shouldn't be done (although a lot of it is just pointing out the already obvious), but like I said, if I cared a little less about the class I might state a protest during class and demand some better excuses.  

If you give a mouse a cookie...

As I was idly sitting in a most important class, I realized the relative unimportance of it. So I decided to engage in a much more productive activity, reading the news. Upon navigating to the Yahoo! home page I browsed through the headlines, and was yet unsurprised to see something about Pres. Elect Obama, something about football, and most interestingly, an article about health. It was labeled "20 Worst Foods in America" (http://health.yahoo.com/experts/eatthis/24416/20-worst-foods-in-america-2009) and it revealed some surprising scientific finds (un-heathy determined by amount of calories.... since we all know how bad they are.....). 

It revealed that one of the least heathy foods found on american restaurant menus, was Blimpie's Veggie Supreme sandwich. The also found that the equivalent of 13 krispy-kreme donuts was to be found inside of one single appetizer (Chilli's deep fried onion, the Awesome Blossom). Alas the (un)heath of americans didn't stop there, but in fact the most unhealthy food found on a menu was none other than a (get this load) Large Chocolate Oreo Milkshake from Baskin' Robins. They then criticized the company for going two years in a row having the most unhealthy food. WHA-! No freakin' duh people! Do I go to Baskin Robins looking for a healthy snack? HECK NO!!! If I order a large chocolate oreo milkshake I'm probably looking for something to fill me up (and fill up my arteries) and I'm not worried about health, it's called indulgence, that's why people buy it. And about the Awesome Blossom, could one person possibly eat that themselves? I sure hope not! it's a group appetizer split between 4-6 people, not a meal for yourself. Just as a dozen donuts wouldn't be all for you (except in the case of Kris), you buy them for a group of people. 

I just think that it's one thing to identify deceivingly unhealthy foods, but it's another to state the obvious, and obviously unwanted, information that the largest-milkshake-you-or-your-grandmother-has-ever-seen is not good for me. Thanks Yahoo! news... you rock.

Life has an interesting way of making things happen. Isn't it funny that no matter how much we dream otherwise, time never stops, days don't slow down, and every perfect situation that we could ever dream of *doesn't* happen. It's funny how one small event can change the course of your week. I don't really like to tell stories that aren't over yet, but there is this one... and it's hecka funny thus far. I met this girl, I thought she was pretty cute... ok, who am I kidding, I thought she was gorgeous! and as such, I was totally freaked out to even talk to her. One evening at a ward gathering we randomly end up talking with each other (yay!) and I met her sister, who's not quite as beautiful, but still an awesome girl. They tell me that 'sure, we should hang out sometime' and the very next day I get a call and hopefully would've done something with them... but timing didn't work out, so we didn't. Then it was thanksgiving and the day after I have a chance to see them again, going on a hike. However the older, more attractive sister doesn't come and I end up on a date (pretty much) with the younger sister.... dag. I can't say I didn't enjoy the hike, I did, it was awesome, but it just didn't work out the way I would have planned it. That reminds me of one of my favorite quotes, "I saw that going differently in my mind." (Hitch) pretty much the story of my life. Solution, stop thinking.

This fall weather

For the past couple of weeks I've been wandering around campus in awe. Every crisp autumn afternoon was a spectacle of color and beauty for me. I loved all the leafs on the ground and all te colors the were. It was magical to see grass covered in what was like a sandy yellow of leaves, only to get blown around by every passer by. The wind, the leafs, the colors, the sun... it was SO amazing, I love this fall weather we've been having. Many people have been on the complaint the past couple of days about how cold it has become and how much they hate winter, but guess what, I still love this fall weather we're having, and yes this is still fall weather.
I think it's about time that BYU students accepted the fact that snow is not only a 'winter' happening, but infact very much a part of fall. In fact snow falls well into the spring in higher elevations, and the presece of snow does not denote winter. I think that red and yellow leaves poking out of a thin layer of snow is just as beautiful as they were all dry and crackly.

I thought it funny of myself to enjoy this fall weather we've been having so much, I don't remember loving the fall colors so much ever before. I think this is because I haven't seen fall colors for a couple of years and it's like seeing it for the first time, which I LOVE. That goes for the snow too. I've always been excited for snowfall, but I think this year I'm just a little more anxious since this will be my first time living in snow for the past two and a half years. And on that note I am SUPER excited for the snow to fall, for the slopes to open, and for me to go skiing!!!

Several Ways to Die Trying

"When you can't fake it hard enough to please everyone, or anyone at all..."
"The artist these days are not who you think they are,"
"...'cause I'm scared of myself again."

Just what are you? Just who am I? What am I tring to be, myself? is anyone ever truly tring to be themselves? who are they and how do they find themselves? I don't claim to entirely be myself, and I'm not saying that no one can be theirselves, but I just like to wonder just who exactly is 'yourself?' I believe that the society that we live in has such a great influence on our attitudes, minds, perceptions, and actions that almost nobody can truly be something not part of it. Even those who are trying to be different, rebel against the norm and be a punk, they too are molded by the society we live in: whatever we are they aren't... So if what they thought was cool became a norm in society would they stop doing it...? Doesn't society then have a sway over what they do just as much as anyone else? maybe not....

I once heard a very interesting quote about self-esteem or self image. This is in relation to what has the greatest influence on our actions/attitudes: "It's not important what you think of yourself, or even what others think of you, but what matters most is what you think other people think of you." How about that? Isn't it true though? You may have great thoughts about yourself, but what if others don't? you don't know that, but you sure might worry about it a lot. Perhaps we're all stuck trying to live the expectations that we expect others to give us........ but I guess in that way we are basing our actions off our own perception of what the norm is, therefore doing what we want, or what we think we want... or want to think.

Enter one of my favorite pasttimes: people-watching. I was at a concert the other night full of emo punks and hotshot rocksters, and it was interesting to think about who they really were or who they were tyring to be. A lot can be ready from a persons clothing, speech, and actions. Then as you observe thier age and supposed social status it begins to paint a picture in your head of who they might think they are. I'm not supposing to be all knowing, nor do I pass judgement on these people, just simple observations that I do believe to be generally true, if not for all cases.
Another hobbie of mine is reading the readers fourum in our campus newspaper. Some people have some crazy opinions. They are often very ridiculous filing thier opinions with extreme biases and generalizations. I once again wonder, what are they trying to be? Are they like this in 'normal' life or is this something they only woud say on paper. Some kid criticized the paper for running an article on getting into fall fashions saying that it was worldly and encouraged people to buy immodest clothing, thence becomming immoral people.... WHAT!?!? I think he just isn't in style and therefore was jelous of those who have even a slight sense of what looks good.

In the end I guess I want to say that I don't necissarily claim to be entirely who I am either. I know a lot of what I want and don't want, but I'll be the first to admit that I am very much in flux, chaning daily. I do think it's interesting how 'finding ourselves' pops up often in our society, especially at this time in my life, college students are bombareded with choices and chances. I do though, love love love the Dashboard Confessional song "Several Ways to Die Trying" about trying to be 'normal.' http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/dashboardconfessional/severalwaystodietrying.html

OK... so this all stemed from some Panic! at the Disco Lyrics. They have some crazy weird meanings in their songs, and it's interesting for me to know that the lead singer grew up mormon, but is no longer. The song, "The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide is Press Coverage" is about "how kids today are being raised under high expectations that create pressure and make them uptight" (a good interepretation). Because of my own gospel centered point of view I do know who I am, I'm not weighed down by worldy expectations, but only that which I have learned to be of real importance. Meaning those things pertaining to eternal salvation. The gospel is the aswer to the question I have posed in this post. Just who are we, and what are we doing here? We are children of God, he loves us and we are here to prove ourselves and someday return to Him.

Choices

There are some things in life that rarely change. I know that for most of my growing up life we had this certain brown-ish, boxy couch. It was somewhat of a staple of growing up in the Murray home. Also our TV, it’s been the same since… almost as long as I can remember, perhaps since I was five or six. You can almost always expect household chores to be underway on any given Saturday morning. One thing that I can always remember is a certain bowl in our kitchen. Ever since I was young it’s always been there, and it’s always been full of fruit. Often times it would hold apples, sometimes peaches or pears, apricots or bananas, even plums and oranges could be found therein, but it always had fruit. Sadly enough, I don’t think I ate all that much fruit when I was growing up… probably not as much as my mother would have liked, but this fruit bowl was always out in the kitchen, sometimes set as a centerpiece on the dining room table, but it was always around.

I think perhaps my mother was trying to get across to us an idea with this. She was offering us fruit, not forcing us to eat it, but just had it there as a permanent offering that would could at anytime eat if we so choose. Perhaps had I been slightly more keen on eating fruit I would have done so, but at least I had the choice, and I know that my mother isn’t upset that I didn’t eat much, she was just happy to have offered it. It’s sort of like in Alma when he tells his son, "whosoever will come may come and partake of the waters of life freely; and whosoever will not come the same is not compelled to come;” it’s as simple as that.

Heart Attack

Sometimes you just have to take a bad day to make life fair. Since last Wednesday I’ve been having pretty good days, I love waking up every morning, seeing the sunrays coming over the mountain and getting ready for another day of life. Honestly every day for nearly a week has been good, and even some great days mixed in there. Last night I went to bed happy, looking forward to today. I had a bunch of stuff to be happy about, dressing up, a dance test, religion class… It was supposed to be great. Then this morning came…. Ugh! Today was not quite the spectacular wonder of happiness that I was expecting, and I’d almost complain about it, but I guess it’s only fair, right? I mean there are children dying in Africa and I can’t take one bad day? Nah, I’ll take this one, I can do that… In fact it’s almost a blessing, a way to remind me that I’m not perfect or invincible. I think there’s a song about that… something about how bleeding lets you know you’re still human. Speaking of songs I think I just want to sing a couple to the world…:

What's a day when it all ends up the same,
and lasts forever?
Can't complain when there's nothing there to blame,
and things can't be better.
Summer evenings, teenage grievings,
got no problem with the life that I've been leading.
No concentration or hesitation,
I can't make time when nothings new,
‘cause waking up is hard to do so...
-Sum 41

If I had a dollar bill for every time I’ve been wrong
Id be a self-made millionaire and you’d still be gone
So hand me down my best dress shoes and my best dress shirt
‘Cause I’m going out in style to cover the hurt…
‘Cause now I’m drunk again
The leads to my end
And I’m scared of myself again….
-Reel Big Fish

On a Sunday go once around,
because when the rides done,
the hopes that you have carried,
they fall out from your hands back to the ground.
Live with that, with that.
They fall out from your hands back to the ground.
Baby live with that, With that.
And the haze clears from your eyes on a Sunday.
Yeah, the haze clears from your eyes on a Sunday.
Learn as the drugs leave.
Learn as you lose it.
You will.
-Jimmy Eat World