The Storm Maker says it ain't so bad...

A most explosive evening of emotions occurred just two days ago. It's taken me this long to find the time to write about it, life's been busy, and I'm afraid it's only going to get worse. After spending the best holiday weekend (Valentines on Saturday and Presidents on Monday) in Las Vegas with some of my best friends (including my roommate, Chris and my the girl I've been dating, Lyndsi), we came home to a busy schedule of school work. To add to the stress and drama of life, Lyndsi decided to tell me that she could no longer date me. And for the first time in three years, I was so overwhelmed I cried. In case she ever reads this, I want to note (again) that she was right, it needed to end now (possibly earlier) heck, maybe it shouldn't have even started... but that's okay. We've both had more fun that we could have ever asked for.

I seem to be taking it rather well, as opposed to the only other time I've broken up like this, I'm not constantly hungry, I actually did get some sleep the past two nights, and I also didn't have the best day ever yesterday (previously my breakup was followed by a week of the best days imaginable). Another oddity is the feeling I've had, though devastated there is something else thats keeping me afloat, one more reason I feel confident that this was supposed to happen. At one point yesterday I noticed to myself that I felt like a 'dead man walking' dead on the inside, but somehow carrying through all that I needed to accomplish. In talking to myself I've started to refer to myself as 'Elder Murray' again.... not sure why. Sadly this post does not have a final conclusion (interesting that I can hardly write something without mentally creating an introduction, body, and conclusion) but the situation itself hasn't yet resolved so I just don't know, and quoting myself from what I said over and over again to my roommates tuesday night, "I just don't know."